A LINE IN THE SKY

notenoughpills @ 2005-02-09T12:19:00

2005-02-09T19:12:13Z

"(So we're) Back where we've been. A waste of time, we would love to waste again. Even if september never seem to come so fast, and good things never seem to last. We're old enough to know whats wrong. "

All you needed was a change of pace to pull yourself out of this self inflicted hell. Are you waking up? Because I can see eyes slowly getting wide. Still sleepy but ready to turn their back on sleeping spells. You've made it this far. Weathered the storm with a few cuts to heal. Once so tall, so straight, now just trying to find some solid ground. You once took that for granted. How does it feel without clouded mind, and clear white eyes?

notenoughpills @ 2005-01-22T16:32:00

2005-01-22T22:34:46Z

This ship is sinking fast. I've tried to keep it afloat, but I couldnt do it alone. I've grown tired, wearied and sick. Maybe if you had tried to solve the problem, and not become its allie. I can see the light house, I just never thought I'd be reaching it alone.

and the crows gather round

2004-05-22T13:39:13Z

Im just waiting. Maybe Jamie can get me a job where she works and that would be good for a while. After all for 2 years I have been bitching how much I want to leave corpus. Maybe this is a good time to just go , earn some cash working to bring back. I also cant wait to go on tour with Day At The Fair. even though its not my band playing. It is shows everynight, and being part of those shows. maybe even filling in on guitar or bass when they guys feel like it. I know I want to start college in August. Ill get that all worked out. for now I see myself following which ever direction I'm pointed in. Dont care where it takes me, good or bad, I will learn from it. eh no clue. I don't want to lose lexi though. Its 3 weeks now, a short time, but she does mean a lot to me. =o/ I will get this worked out in all due time.

notenoughpills @ 2004-04-16T02:22:00

2004-04-16T07:47:37Z

I'm tired, and realized I have constantly felt like im about to break, because I already have. My time here is spent. My bands direction? fuck I dont think we know. I used to have this theory....." if its ment to be, you shouldn't have to make it work, or force anything. If you have to make it work, and you have to try more than twice, maybe it isnt ment to be and better left alone." I dont want to lose any of these guys as friends. I don't want to lose this band, but fuck no one is saying anything. This is ALL I HAVE going for me, and ALL I WANT TO DO. I can't afford to stand still for as long as I have. If they are with me it will mean so much more, but if they aren't I have to do this. My sleeping habbit scare me. Its pathetic when double the intended amount of the strongest sleeping pills (Rx) dont work on you. I keep getting more distance with some long time close friends, and I dont know how to stop it....You bottle things inside. Hopes, Fears, Worries. You don't tell a fucking soul. This is the cause of Wars, Insanity, Suicide, Music, Art, Novels, Poets, ect... Funny how just thought. Something no one else knows goes through someone elses mind, can cause things that inspire, bring sorrow, cause change, make some go mad, or instill a drive within a heart that couldnt be stopped even if it caused the heart to explode. Funny, just thoughts and words.

notenoughpills @ 2004-01-24T07:09:00

2004-01-24T13:16:29Z

Today has left me with the weirdest feeling in my gut. I can't figure out if Im sad or not. I know I'm shocked. I just have this weird feeling in my gut that I cant explain, but I know I don't like it. This timing was perfect with the confusion I have goin on. I really just want to lay down and sleep for 12 hours, but something doesn't want that, because I can't sleep. I would really like having someone to miss. I almost had the feeling I missed ~~her~~ then realized she doesnt deserve that kind of attention. I just miss the feelings she gave to me. I miss someone doing that to me, and it hasnt happened since her. I would really like those memories to form with someone new. I cant wait for us to play shows. The feeling I get from that is one of the best feelings. Losing yourself for 20 or 30 minutes in music is still best feelings. I want to help write the next song. I've got quiet a few things to say. fuck it, im gonna go watch tv. Goodmorning.

notenoughpills @ 2004-01-20T04:38:00

2004-01-20T10:38:49Z

This is Matt Morris.....Im jamming Our Finest Hour.

notenoughpills @ 2004-01-03T10:16:00

2004-01-03T16:16:54Z

I've got things left to say, but you're out the door. 10 seconds to much to ask. So I hear you're keeping better company? Its ok, not like I expected nights wrapped up in each other to last. I could have been....something you'll never let me be. pack up, move on, I've done this before. Tear the pictures off your wall of this time last year. Its true that we don't need this, But I'll admit my bed liked the company. So nothing changed, Did you mean a word of this. To late its over, Forget I asked you to stay. So take your time. I won't build up hopes. I'm Tired of eyes that wont sleep. My apologies for thinking I could be something you would want. Something that could've treated you better than any other thing. So nothing changed, Did you mean a word of this. To late its over, Forget I asked you to stay.

notenoughpills @ 2003-12-30T15:20:00

2003-12-30T21:20:14Z

I swear to god I would take care of ~~you~~. As if that could keep you here. I've been lying to myself, convencing that its not me, its you that has changed. Why leave when you know I would pull teeth, if you asked for one to never forget me.

sleep walking with gasoline

2003-12-29T03:50:35Z

My mind has made something of you that will never be. Something of those nights and the place I thought we could both call home. Seems I'm the only one left filling the pages of letters addressed to the hopes of you and me. "I miss you" 8 letters that keep repeating themselfs. Tearing my sleeping patterns to shit. So Take me home tonight. Fall asleep next to you. And if not light this match and feel the warmth of Summers past, that winters been stealing from these rooms.

P.S. Someone make winter a little less shitty this time around.

notenoughpills @ 2003-12-26T02:23:00

2003-12-26T08:24:04Z

I havent met someone who keep my lungs standing still, in quiet some time.
One could hope to hold there breath keeping winter warmer. No apologies
needed. This was better for you. I would never want to keep those eyes pointed at me.
We both know damn well I never deserved this. Did this even hurt. because if it did your eyes seem to play the pretending part well. Then agian you were always good at hiding your sides. So was it really worth this? Sit surrounded with letters and pictures. Can you feel the ink crawl in your blood?

notenoughpills @ 2003-12-23T04:03:00

2003-12-23T10:12:01Z

A heart held in a cup of wine. The beating keeps the glass warm. You fill empty holes with more than the grey metal I create. Take one step forward, and two back to see how small I really am. Fill these lungs with air. Let it form praise as the oxygen slips back through my throat and out across my tounge. My blood means nothing till mixed with this wine. Tonight, I will fill my dreams with grace and beauty. Faith in what this glass means. Hope In the reflections it gives.

notenoughpills @ 2003-12-08T18:39:00

2003-12-09T00:39:55Z

I totally forgot about homegrown "the pot song".........everybody solo!

notenoughpills @ 2003-11-30T15:14:00

2003-11-30T21:39:39Z

Cold eyes stare back, black, white, and brown. These three colors define over a year of my life. Take back, Fight back. You once said "if we go down, we go down fighting." Seems I'm the only one fighting. For sleep, for air, for something more in this place. You gave it all, then took it away. I hope your pretty eyes burn in hell with you someday my sweet.

Cut With A Razor, Fill With Cyanide

2003-11-29T09:33:04Z

I will make this a date. We can watch tv all night long. While I secretly feel the house with Cyanide. It would be a lie if I said I wouldnt enjoy watching you choke. Maybe we could take a night on the town. Drink the past we build back into our fingertips. Take one more, one to many. So I can watch your vomit steal your breath as you sleep. I used to fill my nights with watching you body curl under the sheets. Did you ever notice I had left the bed? I could cut your name into my arm and lick the blood clean. The thoughts of a boy in love. Breathless and lifeless, every night, every word still caught in my throat. Cough up, breath in, and Move on. Cough up, breath in, and Move on. cough up, breath in, and move on. I'd still enjoy watching you die.

this is why i love this band

2003-10-25T20:39:55Z

"say chris look out across the sky, tell me which way the wind blows"

Please please Mr. Hox wont you tell your daughter im all alone and im not handling this well"

"sometimes taking off can open up your eyes"

"noone ever thinks of me that way"

"why does my heart always beat before yours does?"

"and ill take you blindfolded dancing on to bridges"

"You make me feel so tall, I always want to be this tall. Maybe ill be original. Sometimes things you say, just make me think in different ways, so this is my way of saying. I could be the one who's dragged home at night away from my hopeless dreams. You and me will put some future, because we dont want to be waiting for something right to go wrong"

"tonight ill stay awake long enough to pass out, drunk off nights skies. Lying on hill, wet grass below, blue black above, I will carry all the ways tonight. Cause I keep remembering the day that you said you might go crazy if you spend one more minute with me. I keep thinking about those days, and I dont know, one more minute might kill you now. Stop before i say to much......."

fuck missing having that

2003-09-30T08:56:20Z

I've got this empty space on the couch right next to me.
I wouldn't mind if you'd share this night sky, and conversation,
leading nowhere but to the two of us. Maybe I'd just like to see
waking up next to you every morning for qiute some time.
I could touch your cheeks, and kiss you hips. Waking up
with the taste of your lips. But for now, Ill just close my eyes
and pretend your right here to share this night with me.

How about I watch you choke, and we call it even?

2003-09-25T07:16:19Z

an offence of tryst, a hand covered in past lovers blood.
a deep breath held in hopes you don't get caught.
Did you find me the weakest of your past?
Your eyes are clever lairs, but liars none the less.

So lay here tonight, your lips taste of gasoline.
such a beautiful taste. Ready to strike a match?
send both of us into this black covered autum sky.
Or do you have plans you can beat the flames?

its been 5 hours and not a word from either tounge.
For a second i admit I hoped you had choked to death
so i could ask, "who the fuck did you think you were?"
I've seen more well thought out plans of deception from a 5 year old.

I thought you had nothing to hide
but the black inside those beautiful brown eyes

this was cute

2003-09-23T21:36:12Z

glukid: is this matt
Day was bright: This is matt
Day was bright: whats going on?
glukid: not much hey did you know i had sex with #######
glukid: ??
Day was bright: haha ya
glukid: while you were in the room
Day was bright: haha bragging rights or something?
glukid: well not technically ...we were in the bathroom
glukid: nah just wondering if you knew
Day was bright: haha good for you
Day was bright: ya things get around
glukid: yeah it was
Day was bright: haha
Day was bright: if you are trying to spark a fight or something its not gonna work
glukid: no im not
Day was bright: ok just checkin
glukid: i just wanted to make sure you knew what happend
glukid: i figured thats why you were so pissed
Day was bright: haha that wasnt the reason i quit at all
glukid: wereyou calling me cuz you realized what a stupid mistake you made
Day was bright: haha
Day was bright: no
glukid: oh so you havent realized yet
Day was bright: i was calling to make some type of peice, cause throwing words and insults around is pretty 5th grade

Mike we don't want to be in a band with you.

well fuck

2003-09-16T13:23:46Z

I hate when I find or see something that just makes my gut fall through the floor, but not in a good way. But it fell through the floor from someone who used to make it fall through for a good reason. and the only reason it fell through the floor is because, they have something that you want again with someone else, but for some reason you cant fucking find it. Im going to burn everything down around me and yell fuck really loud.

if memories could buy guns

2003-09-16T13:07:54Z

Can you still find your hands shaking, unsure why, sparked by memory, revealing how this all felt. It felt as if every breath was stolen. hands pulled it straight from our lungs. Some of us are still holding our breath, faces turned blue long ago to match this clear sky. but still we march on, trying to forget our hearts were stabbed out from the back, and fighting off feeling like we're now all alone. Things never make sense until confusion has driven thoughts in circles around our head.

Our own voice

2003-09-15T22:20:22Z

this reflects the stunned faces under clear skies.
right or wrong, you remember, memories like candles never starved for oxegen.
finding fuel in our hearts, causing the shaking in our hands.
Jets fill skies, and tears fill our eyes. reaction taken in human nature.

have we done the best with the cards we had to play?
even if they've held a few up their sleeves. two sides two views.
Ideals and thinking have clashed, history has proved and covered oil
fields in blood smothered with flames. and we can still hear the screaming

Sides chant battle cries, and the sound is so deafing that no one
hears their own voice, maybe we've forgotten we ever had a voice.
or we never had one, because it was never published in headlines
for the masses to read, or flashed across these tv screens holding our airwaves and
attention.

the look right before the headlights hit

2003-09-15T17:17:59Z

Have you ever seen the look in someones eyes, who knows deaths hand is just over them? its like they've seen their ashes spread at sea, and they are about to go through that again. But they still manage to keep tears from pouring out. this look of peace. What was this for? Why do any of us speak a breath, or hold a voice? Does really matter if you ever remember my name in the history books? or will we end up, a bi standard in a picutre that every high school senoirs sees, but never questions names, or faces, or emotions. why do we become so devoted. and why the compasion. We can start fires, burn flags, start wars. but the ones who's names we never know, is what really brought us here. A shot fired, A bullet taken to heart. A mother holding her sons last letter home. why arent these things every written about? hide the horrible things that have brought us here. Save face. either way, it is written off as something "that had to be done." I once saw that look from my grandmothers eyes, and It is something i will never forget, and never understand the composers and look of peace she held, and its something i wont understand till that glaze takes hold of my own eyes.

notenoughpills @ 2003-09-02T08:32:00

2003-09-02T13:35:17Z

Today I will

1. Go to shift meeting
2. go apply where josh has been asking me to
3. Call about the noise the van is making. (two people who have had abotu the same van and year, have told me its nothing much, so rock!)
4. Sleep before 11
5. wake up before work at 10
6. get the balls to call her
7. go to work and be fucking bored

haha sounds like a plan...but i have stuff to do so its all good, and i have two days off after tonight. " I never saw my heart bleeding from my chest"

Why would you want to go away with me?

2003-08-03T13:02:12Z

Your aura shines Red!

What Color Is Your Aura?
brought to you by Quizilla
funny thats my fav color. man 8 am and i just watched sun rise and it was nice. I dont mean to be lame, but well it was nice. I need to sleep soon, because i work tonight and almost every night this week except wednesday.

notenoughpills @ 2003-08-03T07:50:00

2003-08-03T12:52:57Z

"I still drive this car with these automatic windows that we loved so much. As we smoked our fears away. Im still haning on dreams of castles and clouds and white picket fences, you, spending your life with me. you said that id be alright. You said that id be ok. well im not and im missirable and im drinking tonight to remember how good that it felt back when life was real. and ill never give you up, ill never ifnd love without finding an awnsers of why its not attached to you. I still drive this car with these automatic windows that we loved so much. As we smoked our fears away. Im still haning on dreams of castles and kids and white picket fences, you, spending your life with me."

start clean, start new. at least soon I will.